Havila Custard

Well the ship is called Castor (as in Pollux) but it’s being pronounced more and more like the dessert sauce, so that’s what it is.

OK. I last left you Dear Reader, in a flipping STORM. What happened NEXT?

WELL …12 hours later it got a bit calmer, even managed beer bar book and iPad plus a decent kip..

We’re in the grim rain just leaving the Arctic Circle so they’re selling us Trollbrygg which is mulled apple juice cinnamon and rum in a souvenir tin cup for a tenner served on deck 8 in the rain! Warming….

Guess the sights on the Southbound part of this journey are a bit deceptively described, cos 8 months of the year, you can’t see ‘em! And if it’s raining then Northern Lights are tricky too… wonder if there’s a Traden Descriptionnss Actt?

Geek time for me is Day 13: invited to see the Bridge on the ship. Lordy. Sleek, SpaceX like, ship a hybrid Battery/LNG vessel (Natural Gas)…monitors with cameras everywhere on the ship (wonder if they’re watching me pooing?), umpteen weather check screens, and a coffee machine in the corner. Loved it.

Then it’s more and more beautiful stunning fjords galore followed by early morning excursion time in the beautiful city of Trondheim. It’s pitch black. The guide truthfully says “on your left you would have been able to see the beautiful old wooden houses and on your right is the view of the town which in daylight is so pretty…..then it rains a lot and we finally get to the point of this 7am tour. The cathedral is stunning a bit like a smaller but more perfect (everything is pristeeeenn in Nor Way) version of the St John Cathedral in upper Manhattan which took my lungs away.

Then it’s bye bye lunch supper and lunch final cruise day with my fab Swiss ladies Elvira and Rosemarie …I treated them to some rather refreshing Ayala champagne the night before because, dear reader and you won’t believe it, I hadn’t yet drunk my Drink Package Allocation…..bubbles it was, a final night slightly stormy night back into Bergen (I was fast asleep!) and arrival after an exhilarating 12 days along one of the most beautiful coastlines on Earth. There. I said it.

The Brits I met were fun (though a bit ‘I much prefer this boat (sic) to the other company we did back in 1843, the towels are much softer …’)……

For a 68 yr old like me seeing what more I can do in this life, magical….

Last night in Bergen was the (ok back there) gay cocktail bar “No Stress” followed by a panicky morning awaiting a hotel called taxi (“don’t blame us, it’s not OUR fault” thereby failing the first rule of conciergedom Never Blame Anyone Else) but I ordered AN UBER…and Marten saw me back to my Bergen Station start of the most amazing Fjord and Mountain trip back to Oslo everyone on this planet should do.

OMG.

Post Amazing Fjord journey (inc mad rush for connecting train in -14 degrees in thick snow up a mountain), made it back to Oslo for 2 nights (with some most unpleasant watery scrambled egg breakfasts and yes Christos Yianni I KNOW I made a couple of dodgy ones…), Oslo has TURNED Yulesome. Lovely day walking about and a couple of most welcome refreshments amongst the two central 🏳️‍🌈 bars (thanks to Robbie for assistance here)…

So bye bye Norway. Give that wolf a banana! I’ve loved you. You’re so pretty and clean and kinda innocent…..

Next Stop the home country of the best Swedish Eurovision act EVER: LOREEN!!!!