Yoghurt. In a bar. With Chocolate.

Well would you believe it? Yaar vanilla kefir bars (part of the WH Smith Meal Deal) are manufactured in Estonia!

Whatever happened to Cadbury’s, Galaxy, and Toffo? This is what happens when you leave Europe, you get flooded with er ..um… Estonian Fine Food Fare, what next, Latvian Lollies? Lithuanian Lemsip? Moldovan Moussaka?

Dear Reader, I’m gearing up for my mammoth US adventure next month by venturing oop nerth to visit my alternative family… there will be babies to goo goo ga ga at, curries to devour (very slowly these days, what with my teeth rationing) and pints of Timothy Taylor Landlord Bitter to be bitter and twisted with.

UK transport services still use their almost catchy but mostly irritating slogan when travelling and keeping ones eye beady “See it, Say it, Sorted”. Beware Keir Starmer, that’s better than what you’ve got so far.

“The onboard cafeteria is now serving hot and cold drinks, beverages and liquids imbibable by straw…. Hot AND cold snacks are available…you only have to walk for ten minutes each way and pray your overfilled coffee container doesn’t cause fifth degree burns on digits wrists and even lip areas…thank you. Next stop Peterborough”

Thanks however to the continued stands-off between Rail Unions and Management (ie the Gov), my return journey has been cancelled. “Refunds are available at this malfunctioning link…..”. So I’ve had to book another couple of trains on that day and take my chances…..the only alternative appears to be a MegaBus, which hits London after a seven and a half hour journey via Aberdeen, Pontypridd and Weston-Super-Mare (approximately). Or sticking my thumb out in the A1, and praying for a truck driver without bad breath…

Anyone still remotely interested in reading this nonsense may be heartened to know I’ll be more inspired once across the Pond. I will. Truly. More soon…