Betwixt the Coasts: From West to East in 80 Days Part 6: No Misery in Missouri, halfway hoarse!


Well I do declare, gotta be one of the top 3 purdee pretty States in all of the USA. Those New England colours and so vivid too, make the Kansas City Autumn “ahem, Fall” stunning everywhere you look! Being a guest of the fab Mike (four topics in per sentence) Minor, & Scott, in their equally stunning KC house and also in their lakeside hill-atop dwelling in the Ozarks, my own Ozarks have never felt so good!

So there was a bit of money money money please in the Silver Dollar Theme Park packed full of Buy Me food stores and souvenirs, wacky Wild West Saloon shows, a fabulous bluegrass band of OAPs (truly wonderful), plus a Steamboat Lake cruise thing in the last of the Summer Sun (b4 temperatures plummeted from 38 deg C to MINUS THREE on my departure day a week later) and the boat cruise was one of a host of a zillion Tourist Locations in local lake town Branson including Elvis impersonators, The Greatest Irish Accapella Group In The World (apparently), and a Hand-Sleight of magic shows abundant for the Quasi Upmarket Blackpool vacationers visiting this time of year, all with the additional obligatory Hallowe’en Twist.


I really enjoyed the quainter off-the-beaten-track restaurant with old singer-songwriter guy who was terrific, and the home cooking was some of the best I’ve ever tasted….fried chicken and white gravy, triple yum washed down with local beers … memorable! I even bought the Flat Creek Restaurant T-Shirt!


Missouri downsides? Way too much hypocrisy in the form of freeway billboards proclaiming “God. Guns.Trump.” I kid you not. Religious excess at the end of shows…Amazing Grace medleyed with America America felt rather uneasy at times. Still, it was all great fun, most friendly and most rapid travelling around in a Tesla Supercar hunting for Tesla Superchargers (50% 250 mile battery in 15 minutes), and I repeat staggeringly beautiful pretty much everywhere….

The Lady serving at the rather grand Henry Moore & Monet ridden Art Museum did however point out the dodgy area of KC “where it’s not safe to be at night, cos of….the people…”. I needed to go there by day to get to the amazing Concert Hall to look at…by buses actually cos I had an arvo & evening to myself. Ah, not safe eh? Yeah, a bit of a graffitied area with some people living on the streets, and buses full of African Americans whom I hadn’t spied as yet in my whole Missouri experience to date….all rather what I imagined she meant to be honest, but folks perhaps not so visible in the affluentish bits…plus, slightly jarring is the use of the word “Handicapped” rather a lot in the States…I don’t think “Disabled” is political correctness gone mad myself…


The public transport in LA and KC (and Palm Springs & San Diego) is largely taken by the less privileged in these places….is this the same the World over? Discuss…

I chatted for ages to several barmen (including the lovely Logan in “Woody’s”), the mad English accent impersonator Mark at a bus stop (!) discussing Clockwork Orange and busfares, to waitresses and fellow diners (incredibly friendly) and on my last day at a party thrown by M&S for me conversed with some of the nicest (and like minded) folks you could imagine. Hi Peg & David (and more…) Oooh I’m forgetting a long natter with NYC born Teresa (she sold me a woollen hat in Vans super clothes shop….) and another lady downtown who plans to come to the UK soon… just some super people really. Good to know.

No huge humour here (“obviously” - Non-Existent Ed.) but a little report of the both gentle and mad times that were had in Missouri, with people who seem even at an elevated age to have a VASTTTTTTTT amount of energy and sense of frolicsome fun. Without any element of pretence too.

It’s very early and very cold. Luckily, Mike had steered me to a place to get a winter jacket.

Brrrrrrrr……we’re dropped at KC station at 5.45 am. Thanks again guys….

NEXT STOP via my trusty AMTRAK: Chicago, Illinois. The train is again awash with Amish, and another surly coffee seller snarls “Credit Card. Oh.” as I get myself caffeinatedly awake in the morning….

A mish mash? (Better work on that)…..

Outside, the terrain changes to almost exclusively flat, and farmland features heavily en route.

It’s sunny now, as high as 6 degrees in Chicago as I reach HALF WAY in my West to East Trip of Trips.

Thanks for listening! Only another 6 Betwixts To Go! Whoooooopeeeeeee!!!




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